I've always said I don't want to be 50 and say "Gosh, I wish I would have..."
They say "time flies when you're having fun". It also flies when you're multi-tasking and multi-managing different paths in your life all at once. One day you think 30 is old. The next you're at 50 and you have to stop and think about what you've accomplished, and what you have yet to accomplish.
Well, time does fly. Period. It was five years ago that the old Yokel Hardware & Appliance store became the Pour House. I remember shortly after opening, a construction worker stopped in and asked if I had any paint thinner. I pointed him to a nasty bottle of wine and assured him that was as close as I could get! I remember opening day like it was yesterday. I was still in my boxer shorts, pony tail and t-shirt, working to spiff the place for the grand opening later that day. My first two guests, the Zeleny's, strolled in. They wanted to be the first to wine taste... and that they did/were. I didn't even have cash for the register yet, but they didn't care. They toasted. They smiled. They kicked off a fantastic ride for me of meeting people, bringing international entertainment to town, hearing bad jokes (and good ones), getting kudos, and suffering hard knocks. But most importantly, I have made more friends than I have lost. Together, with their support, and the hard work and tolerance of Mike, Tina, Noelle, and later Dani & Kelly, it has been not just a ride... but a hell of a ride! I have gained a family... a "hubby"... a group of friends that were not staff, but weekend family.
If ever red chairs could be infamous... our red chairs are!
Just as "time flies" is familiar, so is "parting is such sweet sorrow". The decision to put the Pour House up for sale was not an easy one. It was a year of tears, no sleep, "plan B" ideas and conversation with my closest friends and family. At first there were as many "Oh are you sure?" comments as there were "You can't do it all". What I finally realized was that the time was never going to be "just right". For every high, there was a low... or two... For every new opportunity that came my way, there was a reason the PHouse wasn't ready to fly on it's own yet and I had to pass. Taking my part-time consulting job with the psychiatric pharmacists was as much mental health for me as it is for their patients. Politics. Other people. Other places. Challenges. Strategy. All of that, from the job, eased for me what I knew. The time would never be JUST RIGHT. And, in September, when I knocked at the door of age 50, I realized that the time was as right as it's ever going to be. Time for me to step away from my baby. Time to offer her hand to someone else, or to put her to bed on the highest of highs. My landlords were notified. The broker was phoned. My family was supportive and one or two were greatly relieved. No. I am not walking away with my head hung low, or my tail between my legs. I am not broke. I did not get rich. This was a labor of love. It brought people, revenue, ideas, interest in the opera house project... and culture to town. It was a success. It is a success. And it's very hard to know that there is a good chance that success will end in just a few weeks. But, for me, the time is right.
So, on this cold, gloomy day, I happily trip down memory lane remembering all the great events, food, wine, music, poetry, people and conversation that has taken place in these very fast five years. I sincerely believe, in the words of the Carpenter's... "we've only just begun". I keep fingers and toes crossed that time will be close enough to just right for the next brave soul to carry the torch that is the Pour House.
As for me, I have actually found a time that is JUST RIGHT. It's just right to start over. They say life begins at 50... 50 is the new 40... blah blah. It is just a number, but it's a good reminder for me that I have a lot to accomplish yet. And that is outside of the Pour House. I get to be part of a national effort to reform not only Medicare, but the way healthcare is provided. I get to work with people and professionals from all over the country to make changes that matter. And there are so many possibilities out there. That's really cool! With the closing of my tenure, the doors are opening and my life will be changing. I'm excited for the next phase of challenges, opportunities and goals. But, you can bet your last dollar that if the Pour House remains open, I will be there, supporting it and the new owners. I might even do a load of dishes if needed! I thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for all these years of love and support for the PHouse. It has been a wild and crazy, but fantastic end to the first part of my life!
Merry Christmas. Happy New Year. Thank you and Cheers!